when it’s cold i like to die

I must have a deep-seated problem with communicating with other people.

I hate the phone, can’t stand it. I avoid using it as much as I can. I have problems calling for an appointment to get a haircut. When I think about having to call someone I don’t know, I get locked up. There’s no reason for the fear, it just comes up and holds me in its grip.

As much as I like to think I can, I can’t talk to my parents about everything that happens to me. I’m constantly afraid that they are going to be angry with me, with whatever I say or do. So I keep them out. I don’t tell them that I am worried about my academics, that I have a girlfriend, that I don’t miss them terribly.


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