chuma.org

• phone-walker: talking on a cell phone and meandering slowly and aimlessly as if drunk, often bumping into people and children
• shoe-shopper: that woman who always DIVES right in front of me in front of the shoe store in BCE place to check out what’s on the bargain table. This happens once a week, I’m not exaggerating
• centre-of-the-universe: walks very slowly and in the exact middle of any given passage, forcing you to navigate around them, like water in a stream going around a three-tonne boulder
• phalanx: walking three or four or more wide.
• stair-ectomy: standing in the way at the top or bottom of a staircase.

I had way more snappier names for these while I was walking at lunchtime.